Interesting question, "Do Children make us happy?" I listened to the Matt Townsend show today and his topic was on this question. There was an article in the New York Times titled, "Does having Children make you Unhappy?" In this article it talks about a study that The Journal of the British Psychological Association made and researchers concluded that children bring unhappiness. Hmmmmm....It was kind of funny that as I was listening to Matt Townsend's show on how hard it is to raise children and it costs over $200,000.00 per kid not including college costs and discussing this question, I was doing the dishes and Ammon was pulling up the stool trying to play in the dishwater and making it really difficult to get the job done. I started laughing to myself because it made me think....yes it would be a lot easier not to have Ammon around messing up my dishes but how empty would my life be without him!!! Very empty. On the radio show, most of the people that called in agreed that it was hard to raise children and sometimes it didn't bring happiness but overall, the satisfaction and joy that their children brought, outweighed the unhappiness. I totally agree. Since I have have my children, the highs have been so high and the lows have been low. If I had to do it over again, I would do it the same. I love my children so much and although sometimes I am unhappy with their decisions and we do have trials, the joy they have brought me has been so wonderful and I wouldn't trade that for anything. Isn't it interesting that people think we shouldn't have kids or as many kids.....I am so grateful for my five children and some days I wish I could have had more. Yes there are days I wish I didn't have so many....:-) but on the whole I am grateful for all of them.
Today, I am spending some one on one time with Kalli as we spend the day together and I'm so excited to be able to take some time with her and give her some extra needed attention. I think that I need to do more of that and take some individual time with each of my kids and show them how important they are to me. What do you think?
Today, I am spending some one on one time with Kalli as we spend the day together and I'm so excited to be able to take some time with her and give her some extra needed attention. I think that I need to do more of that and take some individual time with each of my kids and show them how important they are to me. What do you think?
3 comments:
Great post!!!
It makes me think that happiness in parenting life has a lot to do with how much we put into it. If we neglect our relationship with our kids, or their moral teaching, or having fun with them, then it's going to lead to unhappiness. It's not that having kids makes us unhappy, but our neglect as parents that will lead to unhappiness.
The reverse is true too. Putting a lot of time and thought and effort and patience and love into parenting means great relationships that make parents and kids happy!
I have been learning all about psychological research studies in my schooling and it sounds to me that the author of the article was misquoting the study, or maybe using a study that is not approved or recognized by the APA.
Children definitely make us happy. Not everything they do will bring happiness, but I agree 100% with Candace that the unhappiness comes from neglect of our children. If we are focused on our careers, or things of the world and neglect our family members than we will be unhappy. I personally have never met a parent that said their child brought unhappiness into their life. Never.
I think children bring a happiness that is beyond compare.
I heard about this study and I agree with you: kids are hard and when I'm unhappy, I'm unhappier than I was pre-kids; but the highs make it worth having them. Anything worthwhile (marriage, exercising, etc.) is hard. Rewarding but hard.
Great post, Kari :)
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